Smartass Quotes

You'd be amazed to discover all the tangible things that can come out of dreams." "Like drool?

Are there moments when our brains are not exercising?” I questioned. “That would be almost like being brain dead...

Stars are everything and nothing that we think they are.They are their own world, but through an act of will we make them part of ours. They are the diamonds of the gods, the lights at a stadium where angels play a midnight game of baseball.They’re fairy farts that have been set ablaze! Mostly, they’re just an untouchable beauty that’s so far away, it’s the only place safe enough to store our secret hopes and dreams. When we see a shooting start, we all make a wish. But what nobody admits is how afraid they are of actually catching something that fell from heaven. I’m not afraid to burn. ~Hadrian

Jehovah’s Witness? Don’t sweat it. I’m going to hell, already booked my ticket. Bright side? I’m pagan. Your hell is my heaven... if for no other reason than you won’t be there.

Avoid selling to dumb customers, there aren't enough left!

Have you noticed we can breathe in here too?Gosh, I wouldn't have picked up on that.

You’re injured.” He flicks his chin at my bleeding leg.“We need to get that cleaned up.”“It’ll be fine,” I wave it off. “My mom will descend upon me with a bottle ofperoxide the second I hit the door.

she glanced down and saw that a glove of blood covered her lower arm from the elbow to the wrist. The arm was throbbing, stiff, and painful. "Is this when you start tearing strips off your T-shirt to bind up my wound?" she joked. She hated the sight of blood, especially her own. "If you wanted me to rip my clothes off, you should have just asked." He dug into his pocket and brought out his stele. "It would have been a lot less painful.

if you can’t acquaint an opponent with reason, you must acquaint his head with the sidewalk.

Are you always a smartass?'Nope. Sometimes I'm asleep.

...I guess I can put two and two together.""Sometimes the answer's four," I said, "and sometimes it's twenty-two...

Idiots are of two kinds: those who try to be smart and those who think they are smart.

Oh, hey, kettle, I’m pot and wow, you’re black.” - Owen

Better to play dumb than to go as smartass… after all smartasses get what they deserve in the end.

All my friends seem to be smart arses. Don't ask me why. Like many things, it is what it is.