Humorous Quotation Quotes

The only time I hold my wife's hand tightly is when my wallet is in her other hand.

Women are the best thieves you will ever meet; they steal your heart and your last name, but never get to spend the night in jail.

Be calm when your wife yells at you, calmer when she chastens you, but be terrified when she ignores you.

If God had a wife, He would be in trouble too if He dodged His chores.

She complains that I'm lazy, but I just like to save my energy for dinner.

Be calm on your wedding day; she won’t kill you in front of a hundred people, no matter what you've done.