Calvin Quotes

Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him?

Hobbes: Do you think there's a God?Calvin: Well, somebody's out to get me!

I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin

Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm's Thermonuclear League of Liberty. Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.

No man that ever lived, not John Calvin himself, ever asserted either original sin, or justification by faith, in more strong, more clear and express terms, than Arminius has done.

I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends.

Hobbes: Jump! Jump! Jump! I win! Calvin: You win? Aaugghh! You won last time! I hate it when you win! Aarrggh! Mff! Gnnk! I hate this game! I hate the whole world! Aghhh! What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn't want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you'd cheat! I knew you'd win! Oh! Oh! Aarg! [Calvin runs in circles around Hobbes screaming "Aaaaaaaaaaaa", then falls over.] Hobbes: Look, it's just a game. Calvin: I know! You should see me when I lose in real life!

I have all these great genes, but they're recessive. That's the problem here.

I'm not a vegetarian! I'm a dessertarian!

I’m trying to decide whether to tell you two to get a room or go barf in the trash can,” Emma said. “I’m leaning toward the second choice. You are both getting way too weird. And gross.”Cal barked out a laugh and slid his fingers down my arm to entwine with mine. His touch, and Emma’s comments, only made me blush more. Looks like Emma saw Cal lick my face after all. Now that wasn’t awkward or anything.

True wisdom consists in two things: Knowledge of God and Knowledge of Self.

It would be the height of absurdity to label ignorance tempered by humility "faith"!(Institutio III.2.3)

Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I'd say our afternoon just got booked solid!