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Things we had, like respect and trust, but also freely expressed desires and accountability to whatever degree it took to make both people happy. It took work, a willingness to fight passionately and fairly–out of bed, not just in it–commitment and honesty. It took waking up and saying each day, “I hold this man sacred and always will. He’s my sun, moon, and stars.” It took letting the other person in; a thing I’d stopped doing. It took being unafraid to ask for what you wanted, to put yourself on the line, to risk it all for love.