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Ego is not an enemy to be broken or demolished, as is often portrayed in spiritual literature. We don’t want to get rid of the ego, we want to soften it, make it porous and receptive, so information, thoughts, and compassion flow in and out. A healthy ego allows us to have the strength of our convictions yet be open to others. Psychological literature often refers to ego strength – a sureness about ourselves that rests calmly inside, the will to actualize our dreams, or stand fast to our beliefs without worrying about the consequences.By contrast, the rigid or inflated ego is concrete and dualistic – right-wrong, good-bad, friend-foe…It believes the stories we’ve made up are reality and doesn’t realize that they are only the cover over our essence…To deflect fear, the inflated ego dons a mask and becomes artificial in relationships…This leaves us a stranger to ourself and the person we are meeting. In fact, there has been no authentic connection; it’s only our personas that have met.
