Ada Calhoun Quotes

...that's part of what marriage means: sometimes hating this other person but staying together because you promised you would.

Dating is poetry. Marriage is a novel. There are times, maybe years, that are all exposition.

Forsaking all others means going deep with one person -- exhaustingly deep.

To love somebody is not just a strong feeling -- it is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise," writes psychologist Erich Fromm. "If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stay forever, when my act does not involve judgment and decision?

Wherever you go, there you are. You would just have different problems. Are the problems you have now so bad that any other problems would be better?

The boring parts don't last forever. In retrospect, they aren't even boring.

I want to say that at various points in your marriage, may it last forever, you will look at this person and feel only rage.

By staying married, we give something to ourselves and to others: hope. Hope that in steadfastly loving someone, we ourselves, for all our faults, will be loved; that the broken world will be made whole. To hitch your rickety wagon to the flickering star of another fallible human being -- what an insane thing to do. What a burden, and what a gift.