Quotes by Television Hosts - Page 9

There is nothing more liberating than having your worst fear realized.
Conan O'Brien
She wasn't tracking down her father to learn more about him. She was tracking him down to learn more about herself.
Brad Meltzer
True forgiveness is when you can say, "Thank you for that experience.
Oprah Winfrey
To the people who are upset about their hard-earned tax money going to things they don’t like: welcome to the f*cking club. Reimburse me for the Iraq war and oil subsidies, and diaphragms are on me!
Jon Stewart
I’m not going to censor myself to comfort your ignorance
Jon Stewart
Unfortunately, mental health is so misunderstood that some people think you have to be crazy to need to speak to a therapist.
Nicole Curtis
My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.
Ellen DeGeneres
It must be around forty, when you're "over the hill." I don't even know what that means and why it's a bad thing. When I go hiking and I get over the hill, that means I'm past the hard part and there's a snack in my future. That's a good thing as far as I'm concerned.
Ellen DeGeneres
...I had always believed that I left a bit of me wherever I went. I also believed that I took a bit of every place with me. I never felt that more than with this trip. It was as if the act of touching these places, walking these roads,and asking these questions had added another column to my being. And the only possible explanation I could find for that feeling was that a spirit existed in many of the places I visited, and a spirit existed in me and the two had somehow met in the course of my travels. It's as if the godliness of the land and the godliness of my being had fused.
Bruce Feiler
We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels & free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep & conformists.
Bill Maher
There is no greater gift you can give or receive than to honor your calling. It’s why you were born. And how you become most truly alive.
Oprah Winfrey
Whether I or anyone else accepted the concept of alcoholism as a disease didn't matter; what mattered was that when treated as a disease, those who suffered from it were most likely to recover.
Craig Ferguson
Maybe your aunt is funny in quiet moments with her friends because like many women her age, she was taught to not draw attention to herself. And maybe she also noticed how men of her generation weren't attracted to the women who spoke out of turn and uttered their own opinions out loud. And certainly these types of men weren't attracted to women who were funnier than them. Women have always been funny. They just weren't interested in sharing their jokes with you. Truth in point, my mom is hilarious. She has also been single since 1974.
W. Kamau Bell
If it weren't for acid, you might not have an IPod, and you definitely would not have some of the best music in your IPod.
Bill Maher
L.A.'s large convenience stores are so big they can accommodate up to twenty armed robbers at one time.
Jay Leno
Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.
Oprah Winfrey
You can never talk religion on network TV. It makes too many people angry. You can talk about sex.
Craig Ferguson
I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character.
Jon Stewart
The disowned part of self is an energy - an emotion or desire or need, that has been shamed every time it emerged. These energy patterns are repressed but not destroyed. They are alive in our unconscious.
John Bradshaw
New Rule: You can't put a windmill in your campaign ad if you voted against every single bill that might lead to someone building one. As long as you're sending a camera crew to a farm, why not just take a picture of actual bullshit?
Bill Maher
There are all sorts of books offering advice on how to deal with life-threatening situations, but where's the advice on dealing with embarrassing ones?
Ellen DeGeneres
Know this for sure: When you get the chance, go for it.
Oprah Winfrey
It's not that we don't care--it's just that that we'd prefer not to get involved.
Bill Maher
There is only one you.And there will never be another one.Thats your power
Mel Robbins
In the morning stillness, when the world is just waking up and your conscious mind hasn't fully taken over, you may feel a connection or passageway to another world, and a feeling that something is about to happen in yours. It's like a quiet storm is coming. You can feel the distant rumble of thunder on the horizon, yet you have no idea of the deluge your life is about to experience.
Padma Lakshmi
As you become more clear about who you really are, you'll be better able to decide what is best for you - the first time around.
Oprah Winfrey
Isn't it time we asked ourselves, are we willing to accept any behavior codified within religious or cultural practice? Is there no line to be drawn? If honor killings are okay, then why not virgin sacrifices or cannibalism or sex with children outside the church? We have perversely taken our notion of tolerance to such extremes that we've become tolerant of intolerance.
Bill Maher
The great courageous act that we must all do, is to have the courage to step out of our history and past so that we can live our dreams.
Oprah Winfrey
We checked our bags and got on line with some of our fellow passengers. Judging from the looks of them, it was clear that they were members of a different income bracket from the people I preferred to surround myself with. But since I also wasn't from the income bracket I preferred, I held off on voicing my initial feelings of despair.
Chelsea Handler
Those unexpected morality lessons provided by the trip had jolted me into some kind of action. It was time to jettison the past before the present jettisoned me. This was my first veiled attempt at recovery. Although perhaps I was just running away again. I returned to Glasgow, planning to say a final goodbye to Anne and get out of her life, but ended up drinking with buddies in the Chip Bar and never seeing her. I called her instead to say I was moving to London and told her she could have the house and everything else we owned, which wasn't much. I think she was as relieved as I was that I was leaving town for good.
Craig Ferguson
Jimmy put in a word and told them that if I made it, I wouldn't be able to live with myself without paying them back. That I'd sooner die than owe anyone money for helping me. Apparently Jimmy knew more about me at that point than I knew about myself.
Craig Ferguson
New Rule: Oil companies must stop with the advertisements implying they're friends of the environment. "At Exxon Mobil, we care about a thriving wildlife." Please--the only thing an oil executive has in common with a seagull is they'd both steal french fries from a baby.
Bill Maher
History is simply what's behind us.
Brad Meltzer
I was ambitious and desperate to direct my first film, so I capitulated and blew it. Never again. Never fucking again.
Craig Ferguson
The man who believes that honesty is the best policy is not an honest man.
Paul Hoffman
Procrastinate now, don't put it off.
Ellen DeGeneres
The greatest lesson of life is that you are responsible for your life.
Oprah Winfrey
Austin and I proceeded to knock back a couple of Ketel One and grapefruit juices, which happened to be my drink of the moment. Someone told me that grapefruit was a great detoxifier and I decided I wanted to start cleaning out my liver WHILE I was having a cocktail.
Chelsea Handler
I believe the choice to be excellent begins with aligning your thoughts and words with the intention to require more from yourself.
Oprah Winfrey
Simply being born female in our society is to grow up being told your worth as a person is tied to how slim and attractive you are. Even for those of us lucky enough to have evolved parents, the message is still driven home by the world at large.
Padma Lakshmi
We should no longer allow a mother to be defined as "just a mom". It is on her back that great nations are built. We should no longer allow any woman's voice to be drowned out or disregarded. As we affirm other women, and as we teach our sons, husbands and friends to hold them in the highest regard, we honor both the mothers whose shoulders we've stood on and the daughters who will one day stand tall on ours.
Oprah Winfrey
The only candidate I'd allow to play my music would be Bigfoot, and unless we're talking about foraging for squirrels, he's notoriously apolitical.
Greg Gutfeld
Allowances can always be made for your friends to disagree with you. Disagreement, vehement disagreement, is healthy. Debate is impossible without it. Evil does not question itself, only hope questions itself. Even the incorruptible are corruptible if they cannot accept the possibility of being mistaken. Infallibility is a sin in any man. All laws can be broken and are. Often. Like when a bumblebee flies or an ancient regime is toppled.
Craig Ferguson
Let me give you an idea how long ago they got married. You know where they met? . . . At a Cubs World Series game.
Jay Leno
Our language one of our most precious natural resources deserves at least as much protection as our woodlands streams and whooping cranes.
James Lipton
Admit to yourself women are equal. In fact go ahead and say it. They're superior. Nuff said.
Dennis James
Win or lose, at least I'm doing something.
Mel Robbins
there's nothing more intimate in life than simply being understood. And understanding someone else.
Brad Meltzer
It never ceases to amaze me how much people talk about relationships, think about them, read about them, ask about them - even get in them without a clue how to move them forward.
Steve Harvey
A man fishes for two reasons: he’s either sport fishing or fishing to eat, which means he’s either going to try to catch the biggest fish he can, take a picture of it, admire it with his buddies and toss it back to sea, or he’s going to take that fish on home, scale it, fillet it, toss it in some cornmeal, fry it up, and put it on his plate. This, I think, is a great analogy for how men seek out women.
Steve Harvey
Your calling isn’t something that somebody can tell you about. It’s what you feel. It is the thing that gives you juice. The thing that you are supposed to do. And nobody can tell you what that is. You know it inside yourself.
Oprah Winfrey
A hotel room all to myself is my idea of a good time.
Chelsea Handler
New Rule: The Napa Valley is Disneyland for alcoholics. Be honest, you're not visiting wineries in four days because you're an oenophile, you're doing it because you're a drunk. It's the only place in America where you can pass out in a stranger's house and it's okay, because it's a B&B and you paid for it.
Bill Maher
The bias of the mainstream media is toward sensationalism, conflict, and laziness.
Jon Stewart
If everything is amplified, we hear nothing.
Jon Stewart
It isn't until you come to a spiritual understanding of who you are - not necessarily a religious feeling, but deep down, the spirit within - that you can begin to take control.
Oprah Winfrey
I knew that I had been partially right in the storeroom above the bar on Christmas Day. Whoever I had become had to die.
Craig Ferguson
The reason the founders chafed at the idea of an American standing army and vested the power of war making in the cumbersome legislature was not to disadvantage us against future enemies, but to disincline us toward war as a general matter... With citizen-soldiers, with the certainty of a vigorous political debate over the use of a military subject to politicians' control, the idea was for us to feel it- uncomfortably- every second we were at war. But after a generation or two of shedding the deliberate political encumbrances to war that they left us... war making has become almost an autonomous function of the American state. It never stops.
Rachel Maddow
You know you're a hot mess when the only person buying you drinks all night is yourself.
Chelsea Handler
I didn't flee a dictator or swim an ocean to be an American like some do. I just thought long and hard about it.
Craig Ferguson