Quotes.gd
  • Home
  • Authors
  • Topics
  • Quote of the Day
  • Home
  • Authors
  • Topics
  • Quote of the Day
  • Home
  • Authors
  • Topics
  • Quote of the Day
  • Top 100 Quotes
  • Professions
  • Nationalities

Quotes by Cartoonists - Page 4

The way you blunder from one catastrophe to the next, it's a wonder the whole galaxy doesn't hate you.The galaxy is a big place, General. You provincial military types don't get far enough out to really see that.-General Tagon & Captain Kevyn Andreyasn
Howard Tayler
I do not like a high-organized church. I think that as soon as the congregation reaches a level of one hundred or so people, it is time to build a new church. As soon as the congregation gets to the point where you are not on fairly intimate terms with every other person in that church, then you have become a theater where people can attend services. I do not think you can attend a church service. Service is not something which is there to be viewed as if it were a play or a movie.
Charles M. Schulz
Don't stay in this now. You'll fall behind.
Brian Spellman
When guys try to get a good job and make a lot of money, it's so that they can find a good mate, because they know women like guys with money. Big tits are to men, what big wallets are to women. A sexy woman can have almost any man she wants. And a rich guy can have almost any woman he wants.
Oliver Markus
Gossip is vice enjoyed vicariously - the sweet subtle satisfaction without the risk.
Kin Hubbard
Tell me what you'll do if you're captured by the coyotes... Well, that might work, but does your mother live near here?
Charles M. Schulz
No! Wait! I've got a better idea...""Your ideas tend to result in unnecessary violence, Sergeant Schlock.""And your point is...""Let's broaden the definition of 'necessary'.
Howard Tayler
Men feel about sex the way vampires feel about blood. They don't just like it, they crave it. That's why vampire stories always have strong sexual undercurrents. A vampire's hunger is simply a metaphor for a man's lust.
Oliver Markus Malloy
You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don't help.
Bill Watterson
Rejoice, for bad things are about to happen.
Ryan Sohmer
That's the secret to life... replace one worry with another....
Charles M. Schulz
I grew up in Germany. Europe is far more liberal than America. Even most conservative right-wing parties over there are to the left of the US Democrats on many issues. For example, it wouldn't occur to even the most right-wing party in Europe to oppose universal healthcare. But this isn't a book about politics. It's about sex and drugs. You know, the good stuff.
Oliver Markus Malloy
It's like playing the lottery. It doesn't matter how extremely low the chances are of winning. You gotta be in it to win it. Hitting on every girl in sight is like buying a whole lot of lottery tickets. You never know, one day one of them might actually pay off.
Oliver Markus
Whenever you go with the cheaper option, you end up regretting it
Jeff Kinney
I can't answer you in a nutshell. We wouldn't fit unless we saw the same shrink.
Brian Spellman
Dear Josh, we stopped by to fuck you but you didn't answer the door. Therefore you are gay. Sincerely, Tiffany and Amber.
Daniel Clowes
Why any one place should forever hold enchantment for the reason you are born there is a mystery.
Robert Ripley
Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is only understood if it’s to rise to the top of some imaginary ladder of success. Someone who takes an undemanding job because it affords him the time to pursue other interests and activities is considered a flake. A person who abandons a career in order to stay home and raise children is considered not to be living up to his potential — as if a job title and salary are the sole measure of human worth.You’ll be told in a hundred ways, some subtle and some not, to keep climbing, and never be satisfied with where you are, who you are, and what you’re doing. There are a million ways to sell yourself out, and I guarantee you’ll hear about them.To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.
Bill Watterson
Gertrude, behind her, again had just one... That one little feather she had as a starter. But now that's enough, because now she is smarter.
Dr. Seuss
Anything is possible. Anything can be.
Shel Silverstein
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
James Thurber
As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.
Bill Watterson
Naughtiness is a diamond of childhood.
Aabid Surti
Ourchestra:So you haven't got a drum, just beat your belly.So I haven't got a horn-I'll play my nose.So we haven't any cymbals-We'll just slap our hands together,And though there may be orchestrasThat sound a little betterWith their fancy shiny instrumentsThat cost an awful lot-Hey, we're making music twice as goodBy playing what we've got!
Shel Silverstein
We all have flaws and mine is being wicked.
James Thurber
Make it so good and so clear that it doesn't need any further explanation.
Shel Silverstein
But I've bought a big bat.I'm all ready, you see.Now my troubles are goingTo have troubles with me!
Dr. Seuss
Hooray! Hooray! The end of the world has been postponed!
Hergé
There's and entire world outside these bleak pages, one full of SUNRISES and KITTY-CATS and late-night BURRITO RUNS and the horrible, creaking amble of us all towards DEATH. It is to that world that I am afraid I must release you to now.
David Malki
The VoiceThere is a voice inside of youThat whispers all day long,"I feel this is right for me,I know that this is wrong."No teacher, preacher, parent, friendOr wise man can decideWhat's right for you--just listen toThe voice that speaks inside.
Shel Silverstein
Welcome to Hell. Here's your accordion.
Gary Larson
The universe is probably littered with the one-planet graves of cultures which made the sensible economic decision that there's no good reason to go into space - each discovered, studied, and remembered by the ones who made the irrational decision.
Randall Munroe
You sold out! We elected you, and you sold out! The next time we have an election, I think everyone should vote for himself. Or we might just as well vote for Charlie Brown! Yes, next year we may even say, 'You're elected, Charlie Brown!
Charles M. Schulz
Americans care more about the rights of animals than about what happens to us!
Joe Sacco
Learn from everyone. Follow no one. Watch for patterns. Work like hell.
Scott McCloud
Maxim 36: When the going gets tough, the tough call for close air support.-The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries
Howard Tayler
Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
Dr. Seuss
Men feel about sex the way vampires feel about blood. They don't just like it, they crave it. That's why vampire stories always have strong sexual undercurrents. A vampire's hunger is simply a metaphor for a man's lust. And if a guy is paying attention to you, he wants to have sex with you.
Oliver Markus
You can change only what people know, not what they do.
Scott Adams
When I find the guy who torched that forest, I'm going to eat him. And I'm only going to half-cook him first.-Sergeant Schlock
Howard Tayler
I don't think God wants to be worshiped. I think the only pure worship of God is by loving one another, and I think all other forms of worship became a substitute for the love that we should show one another.
Charles M. Schulz
Of the big five factors in happiness—flexible schedule, imagination, diet, exercise, and sleep—my pick for the most important is exercise.
Scott Adams
Taking a single letter from the alphaber," he said, "should make life simpler.""I don't see why. Take the F from life and you have lie. It's adding a letter to simple that makes it simpler. Taking a letter from hoarder makes it harder.
James Thurber
Men pretend to be “just a friend” at first, even though they want to sleep with you from day one. Otherwise they wouldn't be spending any time, money or attention on you, because these are limited resources and they need these resources to attract a mate. They can't afford to squander them. So they apply these resources to the female that looks to be their best bet to get laid. But they also know that they can't tell the woman on day one that they want to sleep with her, because she'd think it's creepy. So they play along with the illusion that it's “just a friendship” that “suddenly” developed into more, when the woman finally feels inclined to sleep with the guy “because they have a deep connection.” But that was really his goal from day one.
Oliver Markus
How come we play war and not peace?""Too few role models.
Bill Watterson
Writing well means never having to say, "I guess you had to be there.
Jef Mallett
Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.
Charles M. Schulz
The Tausennigan Ob'enn warlords look like cuddly teddy-bears?""Yes, they do, and they'd cheerfully exterminate your entire race for making that observation!""I guess that explains their rich military history, then.
Howard Tayler
Too many moralists begin with a dislike of reality.
Clarence Day Jr.
Happiness is loving your enemies.
Charles M. Schulz
It’s easy to demonstrate how progressive and open-minded and loyal you are when it costs you nothing.
Tim Kreider
They're holding flushes of face cards, and I think we're the pot.
Howard Tayler
The spirit of the law is the least of the things we're prepared to violate.
Howard Tayler
An ad for cigars appears in 100,000 newspapers; sales of that brand increase by 3% for a short time thereafter. A new play receives a viciously negative review in a theatrical journal that prints 500 copies; the playwright shoots himself. Who’s the better writer?
Jason Lutes
Woman's place is in the wrong.
James Thurber
Yes, but none of them can steal my ship.None of them are smart enough to know that it was the right thing to do at the time.
Howard Tayler
Dogs are angels full of poop.
Oliver Gaspirtz
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.
Dr. Seuss
Months passed away without dreams about the Agni Ki…or my father. My new life began to find new rhythm. But then…as suddenly as it always does…everything changed.
Dave Roman
It all began with a shoe on the wall. A shoe on the wall shouldn't be there at all.
Dr. Seuss
PreviousPrevious Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 … 19 Next NextNext

Quotes.gd

  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms
  • DMCA

Site Links

  • Authors
  • Topics
  • Quote Of The Day
  • Top 100 Quotes
  • Professions
  • Nationalities

Authors in the News

  • LeBron James
  • Justin Bieber
  • Bob Marley
  • Ed Sheeran
  • Rohit Sharma
  • Mark Williams
  • Black Sabbath
  • Gisele Bundchen
  • Ozzy Osbourne
  • Rise Against
Quotes.gd
  • Follow us on Facebook Follow us on Facebook
  • Follow us on Instagram Follow us on Instagram
  • Save us on Pinterest Save us on Pinterest
  • Follow us on Youtube Follow us on Youtube
  • Follow us on X Follow us on X

@2024 Quotes.gd. All rights reserved